Wednesday, October 15, 2008

MIX 21 NYC

X Marks the Spot at MIX 21
Friday, October 17th, 10pm
217 Water Street at Beekman
2345JMZ to Fulton, AC to Broadway-Nassau
www.mixnyc.org

MIX 21 is the New York Queer Experimental Film Festival. I would like to tempt you especially to the X Marks the Spot event at 10:00pm on Friday. Filmed and projected on Super8, Punk Fuck Fuck!! is a Qurash Co-Lab film produced and directed primarily by my friends John and Blaise, along with a cooperative of talented, anarchist, Brooklyn-based, super-8 lovin' queers (including me!). All the films in this program look to be boner-inducing and are sure to leave you with lots of new ideas for bedroom fun.

Sunday, September 28, 2008

I

She watched the stars
Through boughs burdened
Low by glistening leaves
Ready to let go

Monday, September 22, 2008

Learning curve?


Via James, cutie-pie extraordinaire.

Thursday, September 18, 2008

To forgive is divine.

Today Father Tony posted this on Bilerico Project. The entire post is a great read, but I especially like the following:

Do not ditch friends. They are for life so be careful about the ones you acquire.

Friends do not need to measure up to your expectations. They do not need to perform to your standards. They do not need to be perfect. Expect to really hate some of the food they lovingly make for you on a regular basis. Expect them to sometimes lose at love and to need you to side with them even if you think they were the source of the problem in the relationship. Expect to marvel at some of their politics and some of their clothing choices. Expect to see them put on fifty pounds and learn to see them as if they were still skinny. Go out to a gay bar with them even if they visually reduce your status. Treat them with esteem when you are socializing with them in a group. Realize that it is only a matter of time before you are the one with no mate, no money, bad shoes, dumb opinions and an extra fifty pounds.

Do not disclose to others the personal and private things you know about them. This is sometimes a spectacularly difficult thing to do. In recent years, an entire protocol has been unofficially developed about how HIV status is disclosed or nor disclosed among friends and acquaintances. If a friend tells you in confidence that he is HIV+ and swears you to secrecy, saying that only you and the doctor know this, you had better be willing to keep that secret to the grave if required. You should keep that secret even if you think that gay men should always disclose their HIV status. You should keep that secret even when you are drunk. You have no right to dictate this decision to anyone else. Consider it an honor and a privilege and a responsibility to have been told this or any secret.

Expect friends to sometimes be a hell of a lot of work.

I have learned some of these lessons the hard way lately. Others I have always tried to practice. No matter how these rules have come to me, inevitably I have broken them and failed to be a good friend. I have made these mistakes rarely with some friends and often with others. Some have forgiven me and others never will.

Regardless, life goes on. I will do my best, as I always have. I think keeping these rules in mind will raise the bar for what constitutes my "best."

Sunday, September 14, 2008

Whirl.




This is chicken enchiladas with salsa verde, with a side of fresh orange and red tomato salsa with corn. Inspired by this recipe, I spent Saturday in the kitchen whipping up some nummers.

Cooking is a kind of therapy for me. I've been practicing lately, trying to reach outside my comfort zone and explore new territory.

But after a week of Asian curries, I felt like returning to comfortable TexMex. Enchiladas were new, however; I usually go for burritos. The salsa verde was a particular surprise--I will definitely be making it again!

I often feel like I don't have much art compared to those around me. My friends are all so creative and have so many fresh ideas and perspectives. I wasn't gifted with much skill for visual or audible artistic expression.

I really enjoy the satisfaction of a meal well made and appreciated by those upon whom I impose my little works of art. I'm going to start thinking of food more as my artistic expression. I think I'll enjoy that and I think I have a lot of room to learn and grow in that area.

Photography, on the other hand, is hard as hell. The Mexican food took so long that I missed the soft evening light. I did my best with the photos above. I'll get better at that, too.

Recipes and Photoshop suggestions are welcome.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Dude! Dude! For reals!


Okay, I know the science is more complicated than this, but still:

If pot will kill MRSA, then sign me up, baby!

I had MRSA two years ago. It was a painful, embarrassing, awful experience. And I was lucky--my doctor diagnosed it immediately and treated it appropriately. I have known many other New Yorkers who have had far worse experiences due to missed and late diagnoses.

Incidentally, at that point in my life I was, shall we say, less "green." It could be that I currently have a lot more defenses against the superbug than back then! Suddenly I'm putting a lot more thought into exploring "herbal" medicine.

Via Towleroad.

Tuesday, September 09, 2008

It's about that time.


I generally hate the idea of "they don't make 'em like they used to." Usually that just isn't the case. The grass always seems greener on the path behind us. Our world, for all its foibles and flaws, is better now than it has ever been.

However, they just don't make ads like this anymore. Brilliant!

I'm looking forward to the day when I earn my cane and daily dose of thorazine. I swear I'm going to forget to take those pills as often as possible, so I can run through the nursing home swinging at visitors and staff.

And you'll be able to hear my cackle all the way in China when they threaten to put a straightjacket on me!

Weirdomatic via Consumerist.

Monday, August 25, 2008

Grammarocide

These two men plead guilty of conspiracy to vandalize government property after a cross-country spree during which they defaced public signs by correcting typos. The men are members of the Typo Eradication Advancement League.

I'm awed and inspired by their temerity. Bravo boys! May your probation pass quickly.

Via Apostrophe Abuse.

Sunday, August 24, 2008

Long Time Gone

Above: Jerry, me, and Matti at Coney Island yesterday.

We rode the Cyclone and the Wonder Wheel, which you can see in the background above. It's truly remarkable how excellent the rides were back in the day, before there was the technology to understand how dangerous they were!

Wow, what a Summer.

I have started several update posts. Eventually one may be wrapped up enough to be delivered to you with a little yellow bow.

Until then, I hope you are enjoying yours!

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

And in other news...

From the weekly newsletter at the law firm where I work:

Ron Smith and his assistant Jan Cooper will be joining our firm--moving date is Friday, June 27th....

Also, on Friday we will be acquiring a new fridge and dishwasher.

For some reason the Summer associate who sits next to me and I find this extraordinarily funny. (Names were changed to protect the guilty.)

Sunday, June 15, 2008

Never forget you.

My apologies for the blog silence. To make up for it, here's a pic of me at IML this Memorial Day weekend. Maybe I'll actually report on it at some point.

There are tons of events going on in NYC this Summer, starting especially next weekend with Leather Pride.

And mark your calendars, the July NYboL party is TOGA, a frat party. Fun!

Thursday, May 15, 2008

This one goes out...

Cyanide and Happiness, a daily webcomic
Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net


This one goes out to everyone who uses smilies and terms like "lol" in the place of actual phrases with words while instant messaging.

Smilies are spice, not substance! If you respond to an IM of mine with only a smiley, you haven't said anything or moved the conversation forward in any way. Say something else.

The same thing goes for "lol" and its ilk.

Use your words, people!

End of rant.

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

NYC AIDS Walk 2008

Above: the St. Mary the Virgin 2007 AIDS Walk team. I'm on the far left.

This is my second year participating in NYC's AIDS Walk. This year the Walk is on Sunday, May 15th. As you can see, I'm rather late sending this fund raising email, so I hope you'll log on and donate right now!

Again this year I am part of the team at my church (St. Mary the Virgin, Times Square) and our team goal is to raise $20,000. My personal goal is $1,000. My hope is that you will help me and my team far surpass our goals.

If you do, you'll be helping the Gay Men's Health Clinic and various other organizations which serve those with HIV/AIDS. I can't emphasize enough the importance of supporting these organizations, especially given our current administration's reduction of funding for...well...everything other than war.

I greatly appreciate even the smallest donation. $5 is great, and if each of you receiving this email gives just that amount, I will be well on my way to reaching my goal. Of course, greater amounts are fantastic.

You can donate by going to my personal fundraising web page at the AIDS Walk web site.

Or, if the above link doesn't work, go to http://aidswalknewyork2008.kintera.org/riotpuprex

This year the St. Mary's team will be walking early, on Saturday, May 14th, just after the noon Mass, because we'd all like to be in church on Sunday morning for Trinity Sunday. If you'd like to join us, just let me know via email or comment nd I'll send you all the details.

Thank you very much.

Friday, April 11, 2008

Gratuitous male beauty!!!

Above: the fantastically-named Brandon Hancock, who plays some sport, though I really can't be bothered to figure out which.

Brought to you by Hot Jock of the Day, a blog run by a friend of mine, which is celebrating its first year anniversary today. They've gone from 900 hits per month to 123,000 in just a year. Congrats guys!

Go check them out and drool.

Friday, April 04, 2008

Ritual.

Above: The Most Reverend Katharine Jefferts Schori, Presiding Bishop and Primate of the Episcopal Church of America, celebrating Mass at St. Mary the Virgin - Times Square during the Feast of Annunciation (transferred). I am a torch bearer, the baldy in the foreground, third from the left.

++Schori preached an excellent sermon which even pushed the boundaries of gender, at one point saying we should all be pregnant with God, as Mary was. I personally interacted with her almost not at all, but from what I observed I found her to be a very gracious, poised lady. Mass certainly went off without a hitch--something that is not so easily achieved at St. Mary's. The liturgy demands more of the celebrant than any other church of which I'm aware.

Liturgical trivia: the torches at Solemn Mass are normally balanced with three at the rails on either side of the altar. For only two people in the world, the Bishop of New York and the Presiding Bishop, we use a seventh torch, which always goes on the Gospel (left) side, as seen above. For every Solemn Mass at St. Mary's, the seventh torch is lit, so that when it is used it is the same height as the other six.

Below: the Invitation to the table.

Thursday, March 20, 2008

XYZ

Cyanide and Happiness, a daily webcomic
Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

One of these things is not like the others.

This quote is from a blog which I like and it sums up my feelings on Spitzer very well:

"[I]t's how Americans pick politicians. We want charismatic, ambitious, driven men . . . who happily go back home to their wives every night.

Riiight. Tell you what -- you find a guy who fits that order, and I'll go open up the tuna.

There are certain combinations that just don't go together, and it's stupid to pretend they do. We elect egotistical control freaks -- Bill Clinton, Michael Bloomberg, Rudy Giuliani -- and then freak out when they act egotistical and start controlling things. What, you thought guys like this actually waited for old ladies to cross the road? You thought they only slept with the chicks they're married to? Where's the challenge in bedding a woman who got a pillow embroidered with "Tonight's the night!" for a wedding gift?

We're breeding Rottweilers, and then we freak out when we find pawprints on our chintz."

Via World Class Stupid.

Friday, February 29, 2008

To thine own self be true.

Today I read an essay about Bishop Paul Moore, who was Bishop of New York for many years. It's quite long, but very good, and I recommend that you read it if you're at all interested in these types of things--or even if you're not. If your eyes are dry by the end, then I'm not sure what planet you're from.

Most powerful to me is not the fact that he was gay and his daughter has told the whole world about it. That's not terribly surprising, though I do commend her bravery.

What affects me is that I have known this man. Not Bishop Moore himself, but men like him.

Priests, monks, judges, doctors, lawyers, accountants, politicians...I have known them all. (No, not biblically, get your mind out of the gutter just this once, even if I can't.) They are all amazing men who exert influence over the world more strongly than your average guy. They make things happen. They heal. They give. They walk through the world surrounded by a n irresistible sphere of influence.

For the most part, these men use their power for good.

And yet they lived their lives in secret.

I have felt, all my life, that being out and proud--being all of who I am on all occasions--is critical to my mental health. Sure, I omit certain details on certain occasions. The biggest exceptions are my grandparents and my job, though the latter is arguably a simple matter of professionalism, as I'm not closeted, I just tone the personality down a lot.

These special men probably went further in society than I could because they hid their sexuality. In the process they attained positions where their unique ability to inspire was felt widely. They changed the world, if only just a little.

I'm not sure what my point is, if there is one. As I grow older and more of my dear friends leave this world, I grow less and less sure how to honor a life. I do, however, know for sure that these lives need to be honored and respected.

I did not get anything I have because of, or even mostly thanks to, my own merit.

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Friday, February 08, 2008

It is not the critic who counts.

I don't get into politics much. Sure, I listen to NPR, I understand the broad strokes of most issues, I vote (usually for Democrats as the lesser of evils), and I occasionally raise funds or donate money to activist organizations. I don't spend much time reading about the details of the issues, debating all of it with my friends, or writing about it on my blog.

However, if you start dissing Matt Foreman, you're making it personal. I've been feeling a rant building up in my esophagus.

You see, Matt is a personal hero of mine. He is both brilliant and extraordinarily compassionate and kind, in my experience a rare combination. In the past year or two he has become a friend to me and to NYboL, which never ceases to amaze me, because he travels with great ease through the A-list scene of NYC gays. Most of those guys are perfectly content to stay entirely within their own strata. And he's not merely slumming it with us--Matt and his partner Frank instead have included me and my brothers in events which we'd otherwise never see. His focus on full inclusion of all types of queer people in our struggle for equal rights is incredibly courageous; the assimilationists at HRC have never had such balls.

So when some dude named Jamie Kirchick writes a disparaging essay about Matt, claiming that during his tenure leading the NGLTF he didn't really focus on advancing gay rights, I get mighty pissed. The man sat down in the middle of Broadway and was arrested there while protesting Don't Ask Don't Tell!!! Who among us has gone so far in recent times?

I'm glad to find that there are others out there who also find Kirchick's words to be ridiculous. To save me a rant, I'll refer you to Alex Blaze. I haven't a clue who this person is, but I am completely on board with his support of Matt and his criticism of Kirchick. Go and read it his piece.

I am sure that Matt is used to this type of thing and his thick skin is serving him well. Still, I am going to make an extra effort to thank him for all he has done, in the hopes of offsetting this dimwit conservative gay who some misguided media person decided to give a platform to spew erroneous negativity. I hope you will consider doing the same.

It is not the critic who counts
Not the one who points out how the strong man stumbled
Or how the doer of deeds might have done better.
The credit belongs to the man
Who is actually in the arena,
Whose face is marred with sweat and dust and blood;
Who strives valiantly;
Who errs and comes short again and again;
Who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions,
And spends himself in a worthy cause;
Who, if he wins, knows the triumph of high achievement;
And who, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly,
So that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls
Who know neither victory or defeat.

-Theodore Roosevelt (1910)